Creating the Akatsuki PART 3
by Irina T
Summary: .


*******Note*******

**Black bolded — Black Zetsu**

* * *

Itachi was looking visibly depressed as he walked down the high school hallway. "What the hell happened to you?" Hidan asked.

"Kisame and I got into a fight this morning." Itachi said.

"About?"

"I was whining about Deidara using my shampoo, Kisame said I was acting like a girl for complaining about it, I called him a fish, more insults were thrown, he called me an emo chick, and I left."

"I'm sorry, but that is f**king hilarious," Hidan said.

"You're not helping." Itachi muttered, walking off.

"Hey, relax Itachi!" Hidan said, rushing up to his friend. "How about this; you crash at my place tonight, give the bastard a little space, and work out your Jashin-damned problems tomorrow. Ok?"

"That actually sounds pretty good." Itachi said.

"Good. Get your ass over to my house at 4. Got it?"

"Got it."

**_WHAM_**

"BASTARD!"

"TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE, ASSHOLE!"

*******Sound*********_ BANG_**

"Is this a bad time?" Itachi asked, nervously following Hidan into the house.

"Nope. This is f**king normal for us." Hidan replied, leading the Uchiha through the house and upstairs to his room. "Although most of those assholes are pretty wound up right now."

"Why?"

"My bitch of a cousin got engaged to a Jashin-damned heathen. He's around here somewhere… Anyway, they're trying to convert his sorry ass to Jashin, but no lucky so far."

"Poor guy." Itachi said, flopping down on the floor. "What's his name?"

"I think it's like Suzu or something…. Yeah, Suzu Uchiha!", Hidan told the Uchiha as Itachi stared at the window when he heard the name. "Hey, you related to the bastard?"

"Hidan, I have to go." Itachi said quietly, rising to his feet and rushing to the door.

"Huh? Hey wait!" Hidan ordered, grabbing the weasel's arm. "What the hell's the big deal?!"

"Trust me, Hidan." Itachi said. "If I don't leave now, bad things will happen."

"What kind of—"

*******Sound*********_ CRASH_**

*******Sound*********_ BOOOOOOM_**

"Too late." Itachi muttered.

Kisame, Sasori, and Deidara were lounging on the couch in the living room, watching a cheap horror movie. "So, Itachi really did decide to crash at Hidan's." Sasori said.

"Don't remind me." Kisame growled. He was busy sulking on the couch, and seeing Sasori and Deidara together like that did little to improve his mood.

"Hey, have you guys looked outside lately?" Zetsu asked. "There's smoke coming from a few blocks over. **Maybe someone's burning to a crisp right now.**"

"Hmm?" Kakuzu asked, walking in from the kitchen. "Where?"

"Out there." Zetsu replied, pointing out the window. "See?"

Kakuzu looked to where Zetsu was pointing. The miser suddenly paled. "That's near Hidan's place." he muttered.

Instantly the group was interested in the fire. "Are you sure?" Sasori asked concerned.

"Positive." Kakuzu confirmed.

"We have to find out if Hidan and Itachi are ok, un!" Deidara cried.

"Calm down." Sasori ordered, taking charge. "Everyone but Zetsu will go. Zetsu, stay here, let Pain and Konan know what happened, then grab Tobi and meet up with us."

"Sir, yes sir!" Zetsu replied, saluting the artist before running off.

"Good. Now let's go."

Kakuzu had been wrong. The smoke wasn't coming from somewhere near Hidan's place. It was coming out of Hidan's place.

When they got there, the house was ablaze, and the firemen didn't appear to be doing anything about it. "What the hell's going on?!" Kisame demanded.

"It's those religious fanatics." a passing fireman stated. "We're trying to put out the fire, but they're blocking us off. Something about the destruction pleasing their God, I think."

"I don't see Hidan or Itachi." Sasori said, looking over the group of zealots.

"There might be more people in there." the fireman went on. "The doorway collapsed, so if anyone's inside, they're trapped."

"Shit!"

"What now, un?!"

"I'll get them." Kakuzu said. Before his friends, the firemen, or the zealots could stop him, he'd run towards the house and burst through a window.

The inside of the house was hot and full of smoke. As he tried to press his way through, something fell off a table and sliced into his leg. He cried out and looked down, barely able to make out a hunter's knife through the smoke. "Of course these people would leave a mess of weapons just lying around." he muttered, pushing on. "Hidan! Itachi!"

As he traveled deeper and deeper into the house, the heat grew worse, and more weapons sliced into him. At one point something fell from the ceiling and sliced into his face, making his cry out. "No way am I backing down without them." He took a deep breath (as best he could in the smoke-filled room) and tried once more to find them "Itachi! HIDAN!"

"Up here!" Hearing the Uchiha's voice, Kakuzu managed to find the stairs and ran up them, stopping in front of a room with a half-opened door. "Itachi, is Hidan in here?!"

"Yeah!" the weasel affirmed. "We tried to get out, but the doorway fell. Hidan got conked on the head and got knocked out. I couldn't carry him out of the house, so I dragged him back up here and closed the door partway to block out the smoke. Not like it helped!"

"C'mon, we're going." Kakuzu said, grabbing the Jashinist and slinging him over his shoulder. "Hurry!"

With Kakuzu carrying Hidan, the two of them were able to make it down the stairs just as the structure collapsed. Kakuzu stumbled over the debris, falling to the ground and getting another deep cut on his cheek. Finally, they were able to make it to the front of the house.

"What now?" Itachi asked, choking on the smoke.

"Out the window!" Kakuzu ordered, tossing the zealot through the window before helping Itachi through. Once his friends were out, Kakuzu followed behind.

The weasel decided that there was no sweeter taste than that of fresh, cool after you've been trapped in a burning building. Instantly he was embraced by Kisame, knocking the air out of him. "You're ok." Kisame whispered.

"Can't…breathe…" Itachi choked out.

A paramedic came over to the teens then. "You three. Please, we need to get you treated for smoke inhalation. And your friend there may need some stitches." he added, pointing to Kakuzu.

Itachi felt his heart sink at the sight of the blood and cuts all over Kakuzu's body. "I really am a jinx."

The police were talking with Hidan and Itachi, trying to figure out what exactly had caused the fire. Itachi mostly answered with monosyllabic words; he seriously doubted the men would believe the fire had been started because he was cursed. "Ok." one of the officers began, "From how it sounds, an accelerant of some sorts was spilled, and something, probably a lighter, set it on fire. That's how it started."

"Did anyone die?" Itachi asked.

"Yeah. One Suzu Uchiha was found in the debris. Relative of yours?"

"An uncle." the weasel quietly answered.

"You have my sympathies." the officer said before pocketing his notebook and walking out. Now Hidan and Itachi were alone in there room.

"What now, asshole?"

"I'm going out." Itachi said.

"Huh? Hey, you can't just leave me!" Hidan called out as Itachi exited the room.

Meanwhile, the others were crowded around Kakuzu, looking at his new stitches with awe. "Do they hurt, un?", Deidara asked the banker.

"Kind of." Kakuzu replied.

"Tobi wants to touch them." the masked teen stated, reaching out only to have his hand smacked away by Zetsu. "**Bad Tobi. **Don't touch."

"Sorry Zetsu."

"Hey, I'm gonna go check on Itachi and Hidan now, ok?" Kisame said, walking out of the room.

"Let us know how they're doing, alright?" Pain asked.

"No problem." The shark walked down the hall and turned into a room a few doors down from where Kakuzu was staying. "Hey Hidan."

"Hey." the zealot replied, trying to stab himself with an empty needle the nurse had carelessly forgotten. "What's up?"

"Nothing. Hey, where's Itachi?"

"Hell if I know. He heard that one of his Jashin-damned relatives croaked in the fire and took off. Why?"

Kisame felt his pulse quicken. "No reason. I'm gonna go find him, ok?"

"Whatever." Hidan said, stabbing himself.

Itachi shut the door to the supply closet. It had taken a while, but he had finally found a scalpel lying in the open.

Rolling up his sleeve, he looked down at the tally marks on his arm. "Time to add one more." he muttered, bringing the knife close to his skin.

*******Sound*********_ BAM_**

Itachi couldn't hide the knife in time, and a moment later Kisame had ripped the weapon out of his hand. "Itachi, don't do this." he ordered.

"Why not?"

"Do you have any idea how messed up it is to cut yourself like that?! You don't have to carry these scars around, Itachi. Or add more to them."

"I killed them." Itachi muttered. "They all died because of me. I'm a fucking jinx, Kisame. And you know it."

"No, you're not!" Kisame protested, dropping the weapon to hold Itachi to his chest. "These things just happen."

The weasel began shaking in his arms. "And what if the next time one of these things 'happen' when I'm at home, huh? Tobi's an Uchiha after all."

"He got thrown out because your family didn't think he was a proper Uchiha, right? It'll be fine."

Itachi's shaking grew worse, and soon his face was buried in Kisame's chest. "And if it doesn't?" he whispered.

"We'll worry about that if it happens." Kisame replied, stroking Itachi's head. "Ok, angel?"

"…Ok, Kisame."

By now, everyone but the shark and weasel had migrated into Hidan's room, including Kakuzu. "You're going to have several lovely scars when those stitches are gone." Konan said to Kakuzu.

"I like them." Hidan said, sitting up in his bed to hug Kakuzu. "They make you look smexy." he said plainly.

"I'm going to pretend I never heard that." Pain said, rolling his eyes.

Just then, a duo of Jashinists barged into the room. "Dear Jashin, Hidan, if we'd known you fucking were in there, we'd never have— Hey, who the hell are all these people?" a man asked, looking around at the teens.

"My friends." Hidan said.

"They look like heathens." a woman said. "Do any of you believe in Jashin?"

"No." came the reply from all the kids.

"Hidan, how could you—"

"Take it upon yourself to try and convert all these people?!" the man finished.

"Huh?"

"What, un?"

"Konan, did he just—"

"Yes, he did."

"Oh Hidan!" the woman cried, flinging her arms around the boy. "How noble of you!"

"Mom, please." Hidan said, looking severely embarrassed.

"The path to converting heathens is fucking long and hard." his father said, looking grim. "Your sorry ass will probably try to give up. I won't fucking allow it!"

"Dad?"

"You are to convert all these heathens, asshole! And you're not allowed back home until you do!"

"WHAT?!"

"You heard him." his mother said. "Convert them, or burn in hell!" With that said, the two left the room.

For a moment, all was silent. Finally, Hidan turned to Pain, a sheepish look on his face. "Any chance I could move in with you, bastards?"


End file.
